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Monday, May 16, 2011

Thoughts on Driving Home, Making Faces, and Hopeless Romantics

Having a car has given me a lot of freedom. Granted, I've only had it since November, but Trixie (because she reminds me of the triceratops from Toy Story 3 somehow) has fulfilled that milestone that the movies claim happens when you turn sixteen and get your license. It's the last sense of accomplishment before graduation and college. But really, getting a first car can happen at any time. The faux belief that every kid gets their first car from their parents at sixteen rarely occurs anymore.

Driving home after work is how I detox. I can sing to anything, dance like I'm in my room, and just be in my own oblivious bubble. There's the option to grab some food, hang with friends, or swing by the library and peruse the music shelves or pick up those holds. After a long day of supervising people, being cheery, and answering questions from both superiors and coworkers alike, I want and need time by myself. I don't have to feel like I've got people to entertain and make sure we're hitting our numbers. I can just be me.


People come and go through my life like the seasons. They're around for a time, but it's not long before there's a falling out and we separate. But I've figured out a way to know whose a friend that is going to stay. Sola, as she's known on the internet, is someone I've known since elementary school via a mutual friend. We didn't really know each other then, but in some kind of crazy fate, we met in middle school. And we just clicked.

Perhaps it's that I tend to not get along with people because I've got a horrible knack for speaking my mind, but for some reason, Sola and I were great friends right off the bat. High school certainly brought about it's challenges, but one thing for sure, we were going to continue to be good friends. And it's all because we could talk without having to say a word. We could just make faces at each other, or random noises and not think anything less.

It's that kind of communication that I really haven't found with other friends. We don't judge each other for our wild and crazy actions, or laugh at them for saying something stupid. We can laugh at jokes - even though they're corny - sing songs, dance, and just be happy to see each other.

But when there's nothing left to say, we always just make faces at each other.


 I can honestly say I've never been wooed. Or charmed by a guy that I liked back. Maybe it's because I was stubborn and focused on my studies while those around me let their hormones take over and fawn over the guys of our school. If nothing else, it's because I'm a tomboy that wore hoodies and jeans and was always seen as "one of the guys" that I never had the experience of a guy flirting with me. In my inner-mind theater, I always dreamed of a guy swooping me off my feet and just being "The One" that I could be with forever. He'd be funny, geeky, and athletic, but also supportive in my yearning for being an author; the shallow side of me would also want him to be handsome.

But of course, those are all fantasies brought on by reading romance books and seeing all the romantic comedies that force those ideas down your throat. And then of course... there's the fantasy come true; every little girl dreaming of becoming a princess. Watching the Royal Wedding made me just wish my life could be even half as interesting as Will & Kate's. I'm 98% a hopeless romantic that wishes for a fairytale to sweep in and change my life.

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