Thoughts on Nancy Drew, Being a Girl, & Spending the Rapture at Applebee's

There are fifty-six books in the original series.  There are currently twenty-three (soon to be twenty-four) computer games, now in both the PC and Mac formats.  There was a totally awesome TV series is the 70s, a decent TV movie in the early 2000s, and a pretty terrible Emma Roberts monstrosity on the big screen rather recently.  Why all the fuss over outdated old Nancy Drew?

Because she's fucking awesome, that's why.

Pardon my French (which she probably speaks).  But, if you don't agree, it's only because you don't really know Nancy or you're insanely jealous of her wonderful life.  She's the only daughter of her lawyer dad, Carson Drew, she has a housekeeper, Hannah Gruen, and she has a totally hot, totally charming, totally chivalrous, totally college-aged, totally football-playing boyfriend named Ned Nickerson.  Her best friend, Helen, vanished after the second book, only to resurface later, married and with a mystery to solve.  Her two other best friends (she's allowed to have more than one) are the cousins Bess Marvin and George Fayne.  Bess is pleasantly plump, kind of dumb, and likes to eat, yet, ironically, she's the one you call for hints in the PC games.  George is lean, kind of dumb, and butch - she carries the bags, plays sports, and steps in as hero to Bess' and Nancy's damsels in distress when Ned isn't around.  As a good friend points out, today, Bess and George would probably be in a weird, incestuous, lesbian relationship, simply because of their odd relationship dynamic.  The girls shouldn't take offense to those descriptions, though.  Everyone is stupid in comparison to Nancy Drew.  And there's only room for one pretty, smart, heterosexual girl in River Heights, Illinois.